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So often, we look down on ourselves and devalue our worth. Many times that comes from outside sources. I will tell you that when an outside input makes us feel like we are less, then we need to be looking elsewhere for our input. Here are some thoughts that I just dumped on a page. I am writing a book about this topic and would love any ideas or stories. There is also a podcast attached this blog – https://www.buzzsprout.com/1624801/episodes/7360324
What does advertising say about us?

  • If we buy this or that we will be cool, attract the right people and get the girl or the guy or the job or the house or everything we want
  • It tells us that we are not enough without the product
  • It creates impossible standards of beauty
  • It’s a lot like pornography and the images it creates about sex
    What does bullying say about us?
  • IF you are the bully it says that you are not enough on your own and you need to tear others down in order to feel like you are important
  • It probably means that you were bullied as a child – most likely at home
  • The one being bullied it makes them feel like they are less and often humiliated
    What does atheism say about the person?
  • You are here today and …. Pushing up daisies tomorrow
    What does creation say about you?
  • That you are unique and special just the way you are
  • That you were created for a purpose that only you can fulfill
  • That there is no one else on the planet like you – you are a one of a kind and we are blessed and honored to know and love you.
    What does how your body was designed say about you and your value?
  • Some are born with diseases that adversely impact their capacity to do certain things. But does this diminish their value? No – I believe that God tells us that we all have a purpose and that purpose is seen in His strength at work through us – not our strength alone. I believe that this means that means that we need to look beyond our greatest challenges and see the gifts
    What do we say about ourselves?
  • That we are not enough
  • That we are stupid
  • That we are poor
  • That we are ugly/fat
  • Not enough education
  • Not enough money
  • Wrong job/no opportunities to improve – stuck
  • No one likes me
  • I’m a bad person
  • No one will ever love me
  • Everyone thinks I am a loser
    Why are these questions important?
    It tells a story about who we think we are. Until we deal with those thoughts that are negative, it makes it impossible to think any different. We create cognitive distortions in our mind that replay like a DVD from hell. It is telling us what the media is saying, what our past is saying, what we think others are saying and what our thoughts about ourselves tell us. We must learn a new way of processing those thoughts and systematically destroying them. The narrative we create in our head or that maybe our parents/peers/media create for us can destroy us or at the very least hold us back from experiencing a life that is beyond compare to anything we can begin to imagine.
    If we are going to make the bold statement – Your Life Matters, then we have to ask the question –
  • What matters about me?
  • What impact do I make?
    • In my own life? § I do things that make me happy § I experience joy by things I do § I provide safety and security § I grow intellectually, emotionally, physically and spiritually § I create a career – a path that I excel in – and this makes me feel good about me – In your home? § Your presence matters – listening § your intelligence and wisdom matters § your capacity to serve your home, even if it is just with ideas and creative input § your caring § your contribution lightens the load of others
      • In school?
        § You create a job for others by being there
        § Your interaction in class and with others makes a difference
      • At work?
        § The product you deliver matters
        § The income you create impacts others/yourself

What about when I am not ok?
o To others

  • I am depressed and no one cares?
    o This is tough because a lot of times people will suffer with depression in silence and they believe that no one cares. The lie we tell ourselves is that no one cares but if we were to reach out and talk with someone about it we would find that there are people who care. There are people who have experienced exactly what we are going through and may be able to help us through it. We may find others who are going through it right now and the fact that you and them are not alone in this struggle any more can be each of your saving grace
  • I am anxious about my future and whether my life really matters and no one cares
    o Your future is full of a lot of unknowns. But what you can do is your best today. You can make a plan and walk it out a day at a time. Make a reasonable timeline based on how long things normally take, like degrees and certifications, and walk it out. Being anxious about the future is common but when we have a plan and a timeline we can reduce it. When we see progress, we feel good about ourselves, that is why a timeline is important. One note – an overly aggressive timeline can be more hurtful than helpful because you will inevitably get behind and this can be anxiety inducing.
    o Progress adds meaning to your life.
  • Why do my choices matter to anyone?
    o Every choice – good or bad – impacts others
  • Why do I matter at all?
    o Every life, no matter how long or short is a complete life and it serves a purpose – it matters
  • Does it matter if I help someone?
    o Think about this for just a moment – You help Joe with a project. It allows him to return home sooner, to spend time with his kids and wife. The happiness that you created by a simple act of assistance cannot be measured. What if it ends up being one of those moments that his wife or kids never forgets because it was something that memorable… What if the fact you helped him and he shares that story with his kids, so they in turn do the same for someone else and the impact becomes exponential. What if Joe in turns helps someone else and it saves their marriage?… The line of impact is beyond comprehension.
  • Does it really matter if I hurt someone?
    o Yes! The same is true but in the opposite direction if you hurt someone instead of helping.
  • What if I hurt myself?
    o Intentional self-harm is an epidemic in this country. When one person hurts themselves by ending their life, it is often followed by several others. When others see us survive a difficult time, it encourages others to persevere.
  • What if I cure cancer?
    o YAY! You are a hero but you don’t have to do something so heroic to matter – small things matter as well
    What if I do nothing?
    No one fails to make an impact. If we were to channel our own inner George Baily, from It’s a Wonderful Life, we would see the truth behind the difference we make. If you are on planet earth, you are doing something and it matters. Even the baby in NICU, who is struggling to be alive is impacting his or her world in ways that we cannot sit here and calculate. So if a struggling infant is making a difference, what does that say for an adult or young person who had a far greater capacity?
    It means that your life matters in ways that we are going to discover. Hang in there with me and let’s explore it. In this podcast/blog, we are going to be hearing stories – some personal and others from people you have heard of and some you haven’t. You are going to hear some statistics and some science, alongside some psychology. Some you agree with, others you won’t and that is ok too.
    But at the end of the day, I want you to know that your life is significant – YOU MATTER!
    God Bless You,
    Dr. Cliff Robertson, Jr.